I mentioned earlier that nobody should try to post a comment to my site. Let me amend that decree. If you’ve posted comments before and can remember how you posted (what name you used and whatnot), then feel free to post a comment, cuz it’ll go right through without me having to moderate it. Otherwise…that’s all I got.

See you in two weeks.

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Right now I’m packing for Egypt. I’ve made a list that I’m going be nervous about until I arrive. Did I bring enough dirty undies? Rusty razors? Oh my, I hope I don’t forget anything! So as I’m going through my list of Things I’ll Need, I realize that I’m also going to have to adhere to other constraints.

Do not bring attention to yourself. Be low-key. Which means Dress low-key. Now I have to make sure that I don’t wear any Slayer tshirts or anything that may offend the locals. Who are Muslim.

Okay fine. I went through my tshirts and found both long- and short-sleeved shirts that only have innocent logos on them. Mostly bike-related. Nothing offensive or tasteless. Okay good. Pants? NO PROBLEM. Jeans are good. Socks and undies? Nobody’s going to see those anyway. CHECK! Ooo, a ball cap.

Okay, here’s where it gets screwy. Can I wear my NASA cap with the scrambled eggs on the bill? No, better not, looks like I’m an admiral or something. Morrow cap? No, that thing is neon yellow and can be seen from space. Can’t wear my LA Coroners cap, cuz that has a chalk outline of a body on it. I definitely WON’T be wearing my Strategic Weapons Facility cap, nor will I be wearing my CIA or FBI caps. Dang, this is getting tough! What about my DT Swiss cap? They’re a bike company, fer chrissake! Yeah, well there IS a red shield with a white cross on the back of it Could I be mistaken for a starting shortstop on the Knights Templar baseball squad? Oh shit… I can’t even wear my Redwings cap, cuz there’s an American flag on it! AK Dept of Fish and Game? No, too military looking on the logo. You know what? Later this bullshit! I’m gonna buy a ballcap in the market in Cairo…

The funny thing with all this? I have a tattoo. On my neck. Flames. Nice logos on my clothes? Fuck, I need a damn turtleneck if I’m needing anything! Preferably one that can deflect a scimitar blade.

This is going to be interesting.

Popularity: 4% [?]

Hey folks. I’m heading to Egypt for 2 weeks. I won’t be posting between now and the time I get back (I assume), so please do me a favor and DO NOT POST ANY COMMENTS while I’m gone. I get so much spam on a daily basis that it’s just silly. I know that I can install a spam filter and whatnot, but simply put, I haven’t. So when I get back, I’m bound to have over 1000 spam comments waiting for me, no joke.

And when I get back I’m going to log in and go straight for the delete button. No way am I going to sift through hundred or thousands of pieces of spam just for one fart joke from Dudeman, zeemzane?

If you have the funniest thing ever seen by human eyeballs, then email it to me. You’ll get my Auto-Reply, but that’s just how that works, innit?

Ta ta for now…if you read on the news that some dolt tipped the pyramid of Khufu over, I swear it wasn’t me!

PS, it’s official now…I’ve turned on the Out Of Office Reply on my email accts. LATER, pigs!!!

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I was standing there at the DJ Shadow show, when I heard some girl yelling at my friend. She was asking him how old he was. He was 28 or 26 or something. When she asked me, I said 36, cuz uhhh, that’s how old I am (until a week from now, when I’ll be 37).
“Oh my god, you ruin EVERYTHING!”
??? Me? Really? I don’t think so.
Never saw her again.
Have a good night, sweetie…
Oh yeah, DJ Shadow and Cut Chemist? KILLER SHOW. And I didn’t ruin it either.
Bite me!

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Dean and I were talking about the web and how nasty it is.  I was describing something completely disgusting that I saw online last week, to which Dean replied:

“…better than cutting off your junk, I suppose.”

Extra thanks to Marty for making that conversation possible.  Marty, you suck.

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I don’t know why the hell the embed code won’t work on my site, cuz it used to, dammit!

Whatever. Here’s the link to awesomeness.

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I’ve decided the following:

Anybody who says “Bros before hos” and means it?  They get a fresh kick in the nuggets with a ski boot.  I’m sitting in a bar, and I heard some meathead say that as his toast to all his buddies.

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I met up with Brent and Kate today.  They had been out doing Important Shit and they wanted to stop at Pies n Pints on their way home.  I live about 10 blks away, so they called and I met up with them and their 9 month old chitlin, Ruby.  We had a couple pints and they had some pies and we just BSd and had a good time.

Brent needed to borrow a book of mine, so they gave me a ride home, and on the way there Brent turned to me and said, “Hold out your hand, I have something really cool for you.”  Okay, whenever one of your friends says that to you, all kinds of red flags should go up (as they did for me in this case), and the closer the friend, the more profound and deeply red that flag should be.  So I held out my hand and he plopped something into it.  I stared at it for the briefest of moments, when I realized that he’d handed me a used diaper.  FUCK!!!  I guess my reaction was good, because Brent got a good laugh out of it.

Thanks buddy…

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Today Dave and I were at work rearranging one of the workspaces. We were just moving boxes and doing some general cleanup. Standard fare. However, we were out in the dungeon, a garage that is separate from the main building. There’s no heat, no radio, no internet, etc… Dave had pulled out one of his many interweb devices and had logged onto some streaming radio website and that’s what he had been listening to. When I walked in, the music had gotten to some absolutely horrible techno/dance/electronica/horribleness, and of course I started calling him names and whining about how crappy the music was.

So Dave said, “Fine, I’ll put on some death music!”, which I was totally okay with, since it would mean that he had to listen to something not of his choosing. Dave searched the site he was at and found a death station (death.fm, even), and it started playing.

??? It wasn’t no heavy metal music wafting about the room. It was creepy mausoleum music or something. At that point Dave looked at the description, and sure enough…he had punched in ‘death music’, and what popped up was music that you could play in a funeral home.  Of course, in retrospect, it made all kinds of sense, because after all, it WAS death.fm.
Why would one want to listen to that?! I’m fairly open-minded, but that was just plain old creepy.

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