email is wonderful
I got this from a friend of mine last Friday. I laughed so hard, I almost shit my pants. Come to think of it…how perfect is that?
“So my day started with a late breakfast of two 8″ flapjacks, two eggs (OE), and two sausage links, with a cup o’ joe. Dropped momma at the airport, she was enroute to J-town Regional B-Ball comp, (her flight was subsequently cancelled due to weather, and she won’t be attending now. She should be in rare form tonight…PISSED!). Following a productive morning of work I attended lunch with the co-workers at Buttwrinkles (downtown branch), where I ingested a salad, a basket of p-corn, and a reuben, with a glass of water. Upon returning to my cubicle, my stomach was roiling like the seas during the final scenes of “The Perfect Storm”, major rumbly in my tumbly….So I head to the commode of choice and embark on a whirlwind scat vacation…all in all a ten minute session. After thoroughly wipin’ it up I go to pull up the skivs and notice some brown particulate matter on the taint section of the BVDs. Waitasecond…I didn’t shart my pants on the way in! From whence did the blow-back come? Long-story-short, I had to untie my shoes, remove the underwear, and ditch em in the rubbish pail…NICE! Haven’t had a malfunction like that in a few years. And I still don’t know where it came from, I think it was blow-by, like when the cylinder walls of an engine become worn and scored by grit etc., exhaust goes by the piston and shoots up into the exhaust manifold, resulting in loss of engine compression. I think I shot with such velocity into the bowl that it shot back up through my legs and into my undies???? WTF….You probably think me a nasty fellow, no? Well sirs, you are correct!!”
Oh my…my stomach hurts.
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